Thoughts For The Day, Christian One-Liners,
Food For Thought, and Inspirational Proverbs
Enjoy humorous Christian one-liners, bulletin bloopers, inspirational and thought provoking contemporary proverbs, Food For Thought, and inspirational Thoughts For The Day.
Thoughts For Day 1
On any important truth
the devil tries to get you to stop too short,
or go too far.
Experience is something you don't get
until just after you need it
Don't be irreplaceable,
if you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted
Never test the depth of the water with both feet
It may be that your sole purpose in life
is simply to serve as a warning to others.
If you think nobody cares if you're alive,
try missing a couple of car payments.
If at first you don't succeed,
skydiving is not for you
If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
Thoughts For Day 2
Some days you are the bug,
some days you are the windshield.
Good judgment comes from bad experience,
and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
Timing has an awful lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.
Experience is the sinking feeling you have made this mistake before.
The journey of a thousand miles
begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire.
No one is listening until you make a mistake.
Never mess up an apology with an excuse.
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day.
Teach him how to fish,and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
Thoughts For Day 3
The quickest way to double your money
is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket
A closed mouth gathers no foot
Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your mouth is moving.
It is far more impressive when others discover your good qualities without your help.
If you lend someone $20,
and never see that person again,
it was probably worth it.
Anything worth taking seriously is worth making fun of
Diplomacy is the art of saying 'good doggie'
while looking for a bigger stick.
The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
Thoughts For Day 4
Remember, amateurs built the ark.
Professionals built the Titanic.
Conscience is what hurts
when everything else feels so good
Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.
Even if you are on the right track,
you'll get run over if you just sit there.
An optimist thinks that this is the best possible world.
A pessimist fears that this is true.
There is always death and taxes
however death doesn't get worse every year.
Thoughts For Day 5
People will accept your ideas much more readily
if you tell them that Benjamin Franklin said it first
You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster
One of life's mysteries is how a two pound box of candy can make you gain five pounds
The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time,
but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.
You don't stop laughing because you grow old,
you grow old because you stopped laughing
I started out with nothing
and still have most of it left
I pretend to work.
They pretend to pay me.
Stress is when you wake up screaming
and you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.
Thoughts For Day 6
Adults are just kids who owe money
It is easier to preach ten sermons
than it is to live one
People are funny. They want the front of the bus,
middle of the road,
and the back of the church.
Opportunity may knock once,
but temptation bangs on your door for years.
Quit griping about your church
if it was perfect, you couldn't belong.
If the church wants a better pastor,
it only needs to pray for the one it has.
God Himself does not propose to judge a man till he is dead.
So why should you?
When you get to your wit's end,
you'll find God lives there.
Thoughts For Day 7
Age is a matter of mind;
If you don't mind,
it doesn't matter.
I don't know why some people change churches.
What difference does it make which one you stay home from?
A lot of church members who are singing 'Standing on the Promises'
are just sitting on the premises.
Outside of traffic, there is nothing that has holds this country back as much as committees
Funny how we set our clocks to arise at 5:00am to be at the job by 7:30, yet when Sunday comes we can't get to church for 11:00am to praise the one who gave us the jobs!
Funny how we call God our Father and Jesus our brother, but find it hard to introduce them to our family.
Funny how we demand justice for others,
but expect mercy from God
Funny how much difficulty some have learning the gospel well enough to tell others, but how simple it is to understand and explain the latest gossip about someone else
Thoughts For Day 8
Funny how we can't think of anything to say when we pray, but don't have any difficulty thinking of things to talk about to a friend
Funny how people want God to answer their prayers, but refuse to listen to His counsel
Funny how people think they are going to Heaven but don't think there is a Hell.
Funny how it is okay to blame God for evil and suffering in the world,but it is not necessary to thank Him for what is good and pleasant
Funny how we are so quick to take directions from a total stranger when we are lost, but are hesitant to take God's direction for our lives.
Funny how small our sins seem, but how big 'their' sins are
Funny how when something goes wrong, we cry, 'Lord, why me?' but when something goes right, we think, 'Hey,it must be me!
Thoughts For Day 9
Big shots are little shots who just keep shooting
Half of being smart,
is knowing what you're dumb at.
Success comes in cans,
not in can'ts.
Destiny is not a matter of chance,
it is a matter of choice.
No burden is too heavy
if it is carried with love.
Happiness is not how much you have,
but how much you enjoy it.
The mind is like a parachute
It only works when open.
Some minds are like concrete,
thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.
Thoughts For Day 10
There is no greater invitation to love,
than loving first.
Obstacles are what you see,
when you take your eyes off the goal.
We accomplish in proportion to what we attempt.
We each need the maturity
to recognize that the things that we share
are far more important
than the disagreements we have.
A man who can smile when things go wrong,
has thought of someone he can blame.
God does not call people as a favor,
but because He has something for them to do.
The perfect love would be one that gives all
and expects nothing in return.
For if one expects nothing,
and asks nothing,
they can never be deceived or disappointed.
It is only when love demands
that it brings on pain.
Thoughts For Day 11
I used be an idealist,
until I got mugged by reality.
God Loves You!
Some people have enough religion to make them hate
but not enough to make them love.
Be not afraid of moving slowly;
Be afraid of standing still.
Those who say it can't be done,
are usually interrupted by others doing it.
You don't know where you are going,
if you are always looking back.
We all have stumbling blocks.
What is most important
is turning them into stepping stones.
Happiness is the illusion
that things are not as crazy as they really are.
Thoughts For Day 12
It is better to have loved and lost
than to have never loved at all.
How often do I desire something,
and that something is already there in my heart.
When you can't solve a problem,
No one cares how much you know,
until they know how much you care!
You can give without loving, but you cannot love without giving.
Greater love hath no man than this,
that a man lay down his life for his friends.
(John 15:13 KJV)
People who wait until the eleventh hour to call on Jesus,
usually die at 10:59.
(More Thoughts For The Day follow these reflective questions.)
You can call on Jesus Today - Click here
When you die do you know where you will go?
Do you know what you need to do to live forever?
Do you know why you believe what you do?
If what you believe isn't true, would you want to know it?
Why wait until the eleventh hour and risk an unexpected death?
Thoughts For Day 13
Politeness is making company feel at home,
when you wish they were.
It is easier to fight for ones principles,
than to live up to them.
Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.
People are lonely,
because they build walls instead of bridges.
He who does not hope to win,
has already lost.
Those who think they know it all
upset those of us who do.
The love we give,
is the only love we keep.
It often shows a fine command of the language,
to say nothing.
Time is too slow for those who wait;
Too swift for those who fear;
Too long for those who grieve;
Too short for those who rejoice;
But for those who love....time is not.
Thoughts For Day 14
For one human being to love another;
That is perhaps the most difficult task;
The work for which all other work is but preparation.
I look at the stone cutter
hammering away at the rock a hundred times,
without so much as a crack showing in it.
Yet at the hundred-and-first blow
it splits in two.
I know it was not that one blow that did it,
but all that had gone before.
Happiness is like a kiss;
It feels best when you give it to someone else.
Almost anything is easier to get into,
than to get out of.
Contentment is not the fulfillment of what you want,
but the realization of how much you already have.
Happiness is found along the way,
not at the end of the journey.
We can only appreciate the miracle of a sunrise,
if we have waited in darkness.
it makes people wonder what you have been up to.
Thoughts For Day 15
I'm going to stop putting things off,
Few things are harder to put up with
than the annoyance of a good example.
When a fellow says it isn't the money,
but the principle of the thing.....
it's the money!
If it were not for optimists,
pessimists would never know how unhappy they are.
It is the weak who are cruel.
Gentleness can only be expected from the strong.
You are your words!
It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool,
than to speak and remove all doubt.
The opposite of love is not hate......
Thought For Day 16
Just because the message may never be received,
does not mean it was not worth sending.
I know you believe you understand what you think I said,
but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.
A coincidence is a small miracle
where God chose to remain anonymous.
You never know what makes some people tick,
until they start to unwind.
If one waits to love
only until he is certain of receiving equal love in return,
he may wait forever.
When everything that can go wrong has gone wrong,
it becomes apparent that it wouldn't have worked anyway.
Don't walk in front of me;
I may not follow.
Don't walk behind me;
I may not lead.
Walk beside me;
And just be my friend.
Thought For Day 17
People may doubt what you say,
but they will always believe what you do.
We come to love not by finding the perfect person,
but learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.
No man is worthy of your tears.
But when you find one who is,
he won't make you cry.
A day hemmed in prayer is less likely to unravel.
Of all the things you wear,
your expression is the most important.
Respect is what we owe;
love is what we give.
The mystery of love is that the more you give,
the more remains in your heart.
If you are not part of the solution,
you are part of the problem.
Thought For Day 18
A friend is one who comes in,
when the whole world has gone out.
If you see someone without a smile,
give him one of yours.
Luck is where opportunity meets preparation.
A smile always adds to your face value.
Experience is what you get,
when you didn't get what you wanted.
You don't attract what you want,
you attract what you are.
You are only as valuable to God
as you are available to God.
Did it ever occur to you,
that nothing ever occurred to God?
Thought For Day 19
When there is a lot of it around,
you never seem to want it very much.
Praise is like champagne;
It should be served while it is still bubbling.
Use what talents you possess:
The woods would be very silent
if no birds sang there except those who sang the best.
If you don't understand my silence,
you will not understand my words.
If everything is going your way,
you are probably heading in the wrong direction.
There are those who make things happen,
those who watch things happen,
and those who wonder what happened.
No matter what,
no matter where,
it's always home,
if love is there.
Loving does not mean looking at each other,
but looking together in the same direction.
Thought For Day 20
A smile is a curve
that straightens things out.
To handle yourself, use your head;
To handle others, use your heart.
Great minds discuss ideas;
Average minds discuss events;
Small minds discuss people.
God gives every bird it's food,
But He does not throw it into it's nest.
Learn from the mistakes of others.
You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.
We are not saved by faith and works
but by faith that works.
ch_ _ch. What is missing?--------- (U R).
Thought For Day 21
The older you get, the better you realize you were.
Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.
Funny how a $10 bill looks so big when you take it to church,
but so small when you take it to the market.
Promises may get friends
but 'tis performance that keeps them.
The first rule of holes:
If you are in one, stop digging.
When you're finally holding all the cards,
why does everyone else decide to play chess.
Friends are those rare people who ask how we are
and then wait to hear the answer.
If you can buy a person's friendship,
it is not worth it.
Thought For Day 22
The reason a dog has so many friends
is that he wags his tail and not his tongue.
A friend is a person who listens attentively
while you say nothing.
Doing nothing for your friends
results in having no friends to do for.
A friend is one who puts his finger on a fault
without rubbing it in.
Deal with other's faults
as gently as if they were your own.
A rich person is not one who has the most,
but is one who needs the least.
To the world you may just be one person,
But to one person you may be the world.
Nothing would be done at all,
if a man waited until he could do it so well,
that no one could find fault with it.
Thought For Day 23
If a child lives with criticism,
He learns to condemn.
If a child lives with hostility,
He learns to fight.
If a child lives with fear,
He learns to be apprehensive.
If a child lives with pity,
He learns to feel sorry for himself.
If a child lives with ridicule,
He learns to be shy.
If a child lives with tolerance,
He learns to be patient.
If a child lives with encouragement,
He learns to be confident.
If a child lives with praise,
He learns to appreciate.
If a child lives with acceptance,
He learns to love.
If a child lives with approval,
He learns to like himself.
If a child lives with recognition,
He learns to have a good goal.
If a child lives with honesty,
He learns what truth is.
If a child lives with fairness,
He learns justice.
If a child lives with security,
He learns to have faith in himself, and those above him.
If a child lives with friendliness,
He learns the world can be a nice place in which to live.
It is surprising how many know how to make a good living,
yet do not know how to live good.
Thinking well is wise,
planning well is wiser,
but doing well is wisest.
The men who try to do something and fail,
are infinitely better than those who try to do nothing
God won't ask the square footage of your house.
He will ask how many people you helped who didn't have a house.
God won't ask how many fancy clothes you had in your closet.
He will ask how many of those clothes you gave away.
God won't ask what your highest salary was.
He will ask if you trampled over any people to obtain that salary.
God won't ask how much overtime you worked.
He will ask did you work overtime for your family.
Thought For Day 24
God won't ask how many promotions you received.
He will ask what you did to promote others.
God won't ask what your job title was.
He will ask did you perform your job to the best of your ability.
God won't ask how many promotions you took to chase a dollar bill.
He will ask how many promotions you refused,
to advance your family's quality of life.
God won't ask how many times you didn't run around on your spouse.
He will ask how many times you did.
God won't ask what your parents did to help you.
He will ask what you did to help your parents.
God won't ask what you did to help yourself.
He will ask what you did to help others.
God won't ask how many friends you had.
He will ask how many people you were a friend to.
Thought For Day 25
God won't ask what you did to protect your rights.
He will ask what you did to protect the right of others.
God won't ask what neighborhood you lived in.
He will ask what other neighborhoods you visited.
God won't ask how many times you told the truth.
He will ask how many times you told a lie.
God won't ask about the color of your skin.
He will ask about the color of your heart.
God won't ask how many times your deeds matched your words.
He will ask how many times they didn't.
God won't ask what social class you were in.
He will ask what kind of 'class' you displayed.
God won't ask what kind of fancy car you drove.
He will ask how many people you took to church who didn't have transportation.
God won't ask how many material possessions you had.
He will ask whether those material possessions dictated your life.
Thought For Day 26
The middle of the road may not be the most exciting place to be,
but at least you will be farther from the ditch-on either side.
An expert knows all the right answers,
if you ask the right questions.
Buying cheap merchandise to save money
is like stopping a clock to save time.
Real friends are those who, when you feel you've made a fool of yourself,
don't feel you've done a permanent job.
I don't have to attend every argument I'm invited to.
Lead your life so you won't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip.
Going to church does not make you a Christian
anymore than going to McDonalds makes you a hamburger
Sometimes the majority only means that all the fools are on the same side.
Thought For Day 27
Life is 10 percent of what happens to you,
and 90 percent of how you respond to it.
Did it ever occur to you that nothing occurs to God?
There are two things I've learned: There is a God. And, I'm not Him.
Following the path of least resistance is what makes rivers and men crooked.
Your worst days are never so bad
that you are beyond the reach of God's grace.
And your best days are never so good
that you are beyond the need of God's grace.
When it comes time to die,
make sure all you got to do is die
No God - No Peace,
Know God - Know Peace.
He who loses money, loses much;
He who loses a friend, loses more;
He who loses faith, loses all.
Thought For Day 28
People are like tea bags
you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are.
How will you spend eternity-Smoking or Nonsmoking?
It is unlikely there will be a reduction in the wages of sin.
Do not wait for the hearse to take you to church.
If you're headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns.
If you don't like the way you were born, try being born again.
Forbidden fruit creates many jams.
Thought For Day 29
It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.
Give God what's right
not what's left.
Man's way leads to a hopeless end
God's way leads to an endless hope.
A lot of kneeling will keep you in good standing.
He who kneels before God can stand before anyone.
In the sentence of life, the devil may be a comma
but never let him be the period.
When praying, don't give God instructions
just report for duty.
Don't wait for six strong men to take you to church.
The church is prayer-conditioned.
WARNING: Exposure to the Son may prevent burning.
Thought For Day 30
It wasn't raining when Noah built the ark.
Most people want to serve God,
but only in an advisory position.
Suffering from truth decay?
Brush up on your Bible.
Never give the devil a ride -- he will always want to drive.
Nothing else ruins the truth like stretching it.
Compassion is difficult to give away because it keeps coming back.
He who angers you.... controls you.
Worry is the darkroom in which negatives can develop.
Generally, Give Satan an inch & he'll be a ruler.
Be ye fishers of men
you catch them & He'll clean them.
Thought For Day 31
God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called.
Read the Bible
- It will scare the hell out of you.
Good judgment comes from bad experience,
and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
Never miss a good chance to shut up.
Families are like fudge
mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber
not the toy.
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
It's frustrating when you know all the answers,
but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.